Written by: Loni Capshew Whatever things are…excellent? Lessons in parental meltdowns, what advice should you follow from others, and how you will know what works. When our three offspring were growing up, Charlie and I were caught in the maelstrom of influences that bombarded our generation of new parents in the seventies. We were at the tail end of the Spock years, still bruised and battered by the Viet Nam War and inclined to be slightly militant regarding individual rights and independent regarding new ideas and distinctly suspicious regarding old ones. All this notwithstanding, when it’s your own child you’re holding in your hands and when that back-breaking responsibility suddenly…
-
-
How I Ended Up Moving in With a Guy From the Internet
By Melanie Masterson Many people ask me why I moved to Muskegon, Michigan from Houston, TX where the economy is strong and there is a life to be had. My honest answer is I met a guy on the internet. Yes, I sound like a love addict when I say these things. And I feel somewhat embarrassed admitting the truth. I met my boyfriend on the internet when I lived in Texas. I was actually starting to get a long being single just fine when he popped into my life. I got an email one day from a dating webpage I actually forgot that I signed up for called veganpassions.com.…
-
Ex’s: How to Find Closure and Make Peace
How to find closure and making peace with my ex’s was a lot like hugging a fire hydrant. I had to be willing to tenderly embrace something that had been pissed on way too many times. So…how do I get closure? Written by: Anonymous Guest Writer When I thought about my past, I was flooded with memories of people, specifically my ex’s. I don’t know about you, but I spent a lot of my time resenting my ex’s: A LOT. Most of my adult life has been devoted to this cause. Here is how to find closure in a relationship… Recognizing The Pattern It didn’t matter the reason why our…
-
A New Friend in Me: Finding Comfort in Being Alone
For most people, watching a beta fish swim around in its tank is peaceful and relaxing. Apparently, this fish prefers to be alone in its own tank. For me, watching that scene is like torture. It seriously stresses me out. Mostly because it exemplifies one of my greatest fears in life. I’ve experienced a variety of fears in my life from clowns to spiders to, at one point, death. However, one of the most threatening fears with which I have struggled is that of being alone. That one word carried such a negative connotation for me for so many years of my life. And, when I say “alone,” I’m not…
-
20 Years Younger Than My Boyfriend – How to Handle an Age Gap Relationship
I am 20 years younger than my boyfriend, and I’ve learned a lot about how to handle an age gap relationship. This makes for some unique relationship conflicts, but we both seem to be up for the challenge. It also makes for some strange self awareness, and that is what this post is about. Dating Someone Older: Becoming Overly Aware of My Age A few years ago I worked at Curves, a women’s only gym. The older ladies would always remind me of my youth and inexperience. They would reminisce about their own younger days, how little they knew, how much they changed. When they were younger, they didn’t know…
-
Why Girls Hate Girls
“Most of my friends are guys. Girls are just so dramatic, emotional and bitchy. I don’t really connect with them and I have more in common with men”. Really? How many of you have heard a woman say this? How many of you have SAID this? I know I have. But are those statements really true? I have come full circle and I realize that no, they are not true for me. So why did I think that way? I have some theories. First of all, I should mention that I get annoyed by people who mirror something about myself that I don’t like or that I am working on.…
-
How To Get Over a Break Up
I’ve experienced some excruciating break-ups. A few were painful because I wanted to be with the person so badly. During one relationship, I saw myself married to him. We dated for less than a year, but from the beginning I admired him and learned from him. He loved to be active and play games and he was smart. I found myself becoming increasingly attached, and then I found myself in increasing fear. I needed more time with him, more assurance, more affirmation. But as our relationship matured, he needed less of all that. My fear made me cling to him…I didn’t know how to stop and I was pushing him…
-
Long Thinky Showers, Ending my Marriage and Learning Ahimsa
By: Meghan Coulter Nelson When I was asked to write for Alison’s Notebook, I was so excited. I thought “Someone wants to hear my story! I’ve always wanted to write it down.” She asked to me write about several topics: my marriage, the disintegration of my marriage, moving half way across the US for love, coming back when that failed, falling in love again and getting remarried, and my super amazing awesome family. I thought this challenge would be a no brainer. I sat down to put my thoughts on paper, and I tried to tell the story of my first marriage. Beginning in the middle of the relationship on…
-
How To Make a Vision Board
First of all: what is a vision board? It’s a visual representation of my goals. For whatever reason, I can’t always articulate what I want, but I can visualize it. Before I met my boyfriend Chris, I spent time meditating and journaling about the qualities I wanted in a partner. I wrote a lot of stuff down, but what I couldn’t write was the feeling I wanted to have. I had an image in my mind of tenderness and understanding that’s hard to describe. In the months before I met Chris, I had three short relationships. Usually I cling to failing relationships, except in this instance I finally knew what…
-
Whatever is True
Whatever is true… (This post is not about my boyfriend…) Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. (Phil 4:8) The content of this post is specific and personal. I am usually more vague when I blog, but you don’t mind, do you? 🙂 One night a few years ago, I felt intense anxiety about a situation. During that week, a friend and I had committed to meditate on the verse above, particularly the first phrase “whatever is true”. During those moments…
